Lisa’s Mix

I remember it clearly. It was Friday, July 4th weekend, and very busy in the ER. I was lost in my thoughts as I went about my business. Then the bombshell. Lisa got a call: her 14 year old daughter was killed in a boating accident. OMG…a mother’s worst nightmare. She was with her grandparents for the holiday weekend on the lake. Several of the nurses quickly mobilized a plan to gather funds to send her and her husband to her side. I quickly wrote a check. A sense or horror and sadness hung over the whole ER like a heavy blanket.

That was 2 years ago. I have watched her grieving from afar. I have read her FB posts. And, participated where I could or felt lead to as she worked through her grief. We are friendly coworkers. A bright and smiley face greeted me whenever we worked together. Yet, some part of me was afraid to approach her. What can I say to someone whose heart has been torn apart? What appropriate words are there in such tragic circumstances? I felt inadequate; there are no words that will do the job. They will either be presumptive, ineffectual, condescending or even innocently hurtful. She who grieves is probably the loneliest person on the face of the earth.

Yet, I think about her and her pain. Recently, I felt very strongly impressed to give her a song mix to encourage and to help the healing process. I’ve prayed and thought about it a lot, carefully choosing these powerful and meaningful pieces. My prayer is for these songs to usher in the Comforter, the Holy Spirit into Lisa’s heart and gently hug her firmly and soothingly. That the words and spirit in these songs bring Lisa to her knees figuratively and literally before the Almighty who knows intimately how it feels to lose a child. After all, He lost His only Son.

I thoughtfully chose these 4 songs because of how they have impacted me and how true they resonate with me: Worn by Tenth Avenue North, Need You Now by Plumb, Beauty From Pain by SuperChick, and Praise You In This Storm by Third Day. The most meaningful one for me is Beauty From Pain by Superchick. I cried many painful, despondent tears while listening to it on repeat when it first came out in 2006. The vocals are hauntingly beautiful, the lyrics honest and raw.

“My whole world is the pain inside me. The best I can do is just get through the day.”
“This night’s been so long. I cling to Your promise. There will be a dawn.”

In the midst of such pain and depression, they sing of hope and of the light at the end of the tunnel. That theme struck me and powerfully encouraged me in a dark, dark time of my life. I thank God that there are gifted artists in this world who are lights, who point the way to Jesus our Lord and our only hope.

Worn by Tenth Avenue North

I’m tired
I’m worn
My heart is heavy
From the work it takes to keep on breathing

I’ve made mistakes
I’ve let my hope fail
My soul feels crushed
By the weight of this world
And I know that you can give me rest
So I cry out with all that I have left

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart that’s frail and torn

I want to know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause I’m worn

I know I need
To lift my eyes up
But I’m too weak
Life just won’t let up
And I know that You can give me rest
So I cry out with all that I have left

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart that’s frail and torn

I want to know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause I’m worn

And my prayers are wearing thin
I’m worn even before the day begins
I’m worn I’ve lost my will to fight
I’m worn so heaven so come and fluid my eyes

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart that’s frail and torn

I want to know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Yes all that’s dead inside will be reborn
Though I’m worn
Yeah I’m worn

http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/t/tenth_avenue_north/worn.html

Need You Now by Plumb

Well, everybody’s got a story to tell
And everybody’s got a wound to be healed
I want to believe there’s beauty here
‘Cause oh, I get so tired of holding on
I can’t let go, I can’t move on
I want to believe there’s meaning here

How many times have you heard me cry out
“God please take this?”
How many times have you given me strength to
Just keep breathing?
Oh I need you
God, I need you now

Standing on a road I didn’t plan
Wondering how I go to where I am
I’m trying to hear that still small voice
I’m trying to hear above the noise

How many times have you heard me cry out
“God please take this?”
How many times have you given me strength to
Just keep breathing?
Oh I need you
God, I need you now

Though I walk,
Though I Walk through the shadows
And I, I am so afraid
Please stay, Please stay right beside me
With every single step I take

How many times have you heard me cry out?
And how many times have you given me strenth?

How many times have you heard me cry out
“God please take this?”
How many times have you given me strength to
Just keep breathing?
Oh I need you
God, I need you now.

I need you now
Oh I need you
God, I need you now.
I need you now
I need you now

http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/p/plumb/need_you_now.html

Beauty From Pain by Superchick

The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know i’m alive but i feel like i’ve died
And all that’s left is to accept that it’s over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that i made
I try to keep warm but i just grow colder
I feel like i’m slipping away

After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today,
Someday i’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

My whole world is the pain inside me
The best i can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I’ll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though i can’t understand why this happened
I know that i will when i look back someday
And see how you’ve brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames

After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today,
Someday i’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

Here i am, at the end of me
Tryin to hold to what i can’t see
I forgot how to hope
This night’s been so long
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn

After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today,
Someday i’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/s/superchick/beauty_from_pain.html

Praise You In This Storm [Acoustic] by Casting Crowns

Songwriters: HERMS, BERNIE / HALL, MARK
I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say “Amen”, and it’s still rainingBut as the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes awayI’ll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this stormI remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can’t find YouAs the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes awayI’ll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this stormI lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and EarthI’ll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
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